Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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