Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
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