You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize