I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
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