I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
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