the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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