apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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