When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
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