When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
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There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
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Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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