she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I've blown a few things in my day
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
