Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize