my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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