listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize