When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize