she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
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