Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
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