I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
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