What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
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