Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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