If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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