At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
you made out with another girl for some wings
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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