My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
So many bounce houses so little time
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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