"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Of course I have a pirate flag
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
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