You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
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