i was rollin on her like bob the builder
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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