I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
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