I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
he thought i was a dude.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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