chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
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The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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