U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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