at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Someone came in the potted fern
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize