So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
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