..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
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She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
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Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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