i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Terrible idea I love it
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize