I like my sex mixed with concussions.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
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