So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize