I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
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