I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
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You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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