That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
false alarm. still invincible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
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