you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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