I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
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