so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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