I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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