is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
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