How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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