shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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