If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
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I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
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It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
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