I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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