it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize