It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Randomize