She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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